19 July 01
“The Girl in Your Class”
by Eric R.
I find it strange that Dave hasn’t posted his rant on this topic, since he’s the guy who got everybody to write on the same topic. Josh, Anselor, Jordan, Scott, and John have all submitted their contribution. Maybe he’s just feverishly working on the denialofpurpose.com main page and doesn’t have the time to join the most holy commune.
Nack. Nack is computer-ese for “Not ACK”. Now you know. “ACK” is something network devices say to others as a way of saying “ok”. So, naturally “Nack” is the opposite. A network device can tell another one Nack if some packets got lost, or if it’s denying some sort of connection request. Now you know why I sometimes have the away message “Nack”. If one more person asks me “Nick?” at random when I’m away, then replies to the auto-response with “Patty-whack” I will become crazy berzerker insano man and no living thing will be safe from my wrath. So stop doing it. Anselor stop doing it.
That girl in my class.
If there is a “that girl in my class” I without a doubt do better in my homework and my studies. I don’t have to know her name, I don’t have to talk to her, I don’t have to sit near her. She doesn’t have to show up to class but once every other week. For some reason, I just do better. The grad class I’m in now, unfortunately, has no “that girl in my class” so I’ve been procrastinating on my final project which was assigned four weeks ago. I’ll probably get a C in that class just because there’s no “that girl in my class”.
The last couple times there was a “that girl in my class” I aced dang near every test and asked good questions. I did the homework and occasionally cracked open a book to learn at home. The dictionary calls this act “studying”. I guarantee that since I was 15 my grades have been directly related to the number of attractive girls in attendance.
Among my thoughts on this subject are the following, but I couldn’t fit it into this writing so here it is in sentence fragment form after this horrible runon sentence. Staring forward in the teacher’s direction, but not actually absorbing the lectured material because my optic nerves have severed themselves and are collectively staring backwards at the back wall of my skull, trying to remember the wonder that is the girl a few rows behind me. If I could have a one-way mirror installed in the back of my head, I’d probably go for it.
At the moment, I don’t have a “THE girl in school”, just the usual “that girl in my class”. This is an important distinction. A “that” girl can make me pay attention, etc. A “THE” girl is much more .. uh .. good. That sort of girl makes me go completely insane. Too bad I don’t get to sit next to one of those. I probably won’t sit next to one of those any time soon anyway. I just ate a whole can of pork ‘n beans.